I call my son a little mutt. Yes, I know what a mutt is and yes, I know what I'm setting myself up for. I'm setting myself up for evening phone calls from teachers complaining that my son called his friend a mutt on the playground. I'm setting myself up for several awkward conversations with other parents about name-calling and I'm setting myself up to have to explain to my son that yes, we call him that but no, it's not a nice thing to say. Do as I say and not what I do.
It all started because my husband and I call our dogs (who, ironically, are purebred) "The Mutts". Things like "Did you give the mutts their food?" or "Want to take the mutts on a walk?" are commonly said in our house. When Joey was born, we simply added him to the equation. "How about I take the little mutt (Joey) upstairs and put him to bed while you take the big mutts (our dogs) out?" It was funny at first. Now it's annoyingly catchy and we can't seem to stop saying it. Scoff all you want. I'm not the only one who calls my son an irritating yet cute pet (no pun intended) name. I know a couple who calls their daughter a "Cutie Tootie" and another friend who calls her son "Mr.Farty Farm". And my grandparents gave my dad the unfortunate initials G.A.S. and had the audacity (and humor) to have an initial sweater monogrammed for him.
So for now, I'm going to keep calling Joey a little Mutt and just hope that his first word is "mama" or "dada". If he says "lil'mutt" before he says "Gramma", I'll definitely have some explaining to do.
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